Picture yourself at a Buffet of awesome, amazing food that just makes your mouth water . . . Then imagine that you have three hours before your next appt. If you’re currently on a diet, pretend this is a cheat day without any restrictions. How are the next three hours going to go? The first hour will probably be pretty blissful. The second hour you’ll probably feel sick and the third hour will likely just be eating out of boredom. Now picture your children at that same buffet . . . How will their next three hours go? If your kids are picky like mine, then their courses for the next three hours are going to be filled with fruit, lemonade, mac and cheese, and any dessert they can get their hands on. To put it plainly, our children aren’t going to fare any better than we are at a buffet without limits.
When we get on our smart-phones, tablets, TVs, and computers; it’s very much like we are entering an enormous all you can eat buffet. The videos, pictures, games, music, news, and information are truly endless. In like manner, if we don’t have any goal in mind and some clear boundaries for ourselves, we will make ourselves sick gorging on the never-ending buffet of media available to us on our digital screens.
So how do we approach screen-time with purpose and help our children learn this vital skill?
Let’s start with what purposeful screen-time is not:
It’s not a Distraction
Allowing ourselves to be distracted frequently with screens diminishes our ability to engage in meaningful ways with the world around us. If our favorite online games, TV shows, or news headlines perpetually distract us, the time energy and focus we have to spend pursuing meaningful dreams and goals in our lives also decreases. Perpetual distraction will also detract from the quality and depth of our relationships we might otherwise enjoy with our close family members and friends.
It’s not an Escape
Just like the habit of eating unhealthy food as a way to cope with negative emotions can create a big health issue in any one of our lives, allowing our children to use screen-time as a perpetual escape from discomfort also builds a habit that can create big, big problems down the road. Using screen-time to escape or numb out negative emotions or discomfort builds dependency on screen-time. Addiction to stimulating screen-time activities such as video gaming or pornography naturally follow when a habit of using screen-time as an escape is developed.
Now, you may be thinking, “What about screen-time just for fun? Or as entertainment? What about screen-time for relaxation and unwinding?”
I would actually say that all of those things; fun, entertainment, relaxation, and unwinding are good purposes and goals with which to use screen-time. The difference is that we have a clear intention for our screen-time ahead of time.
So what does it take to be purposeful in our use of screen-time?
Two Things:
Have a Goal in Mind
Keep it Time limited
With Purpose: Part II coming soon . . .
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Bottom Photo by S Migaj on Pexels.com